Compassion and Mercy

Compassion and Mercy

Theme for the Week

Reflection By Scott Stoner

Have mercy on me, O God, according to your unfailing love; according to your great compassion blot out my transgressions.
- Psalm 51:1 (NIV)

Mercy is a word that is found repeatedly in the Bible. Sometimes it appears when a person is asking for God to have mercy on them. Other times it appears when talking about how God or Jesus shows mercy on those who are suffering in some way. Some passages exhort believers to show mercy to others.

This week’s reflections will focus on the relationship between compassion and mercy. We learned previously that one definition of compassion is “sympathetic consciousness of others’ distress together with a desire to alleviate it.” One initial way to think about mercy is that it is the way we put our desire to alleviate another person’s suffering into action. An act of mercy is an expression of compassion.

Mercy can be expressed in several ways, including visiting people who are sick or imprisoned, feeding those who are hungry, providing clothing and housing for people in need, forgiving, offering comfort to those who are afflicted, and praying for others.

In yesterday’s reflection, Chris Yaw, with the help of author Henri Nouwen, reminded us that “compassion means full immersion in the condition of being human.” This week we will explore how mercy calls us more deeply into that “full immersion.”

Making it Personal: What initial thoughts do you have about the relationship between compassion and mercy? Can you think of a time when someone showed mercy to you? How about a time when you showed mercy to someone else? How did it feel?

Help Yourself? Help Others.

Help Yourself? Help Others.

The Fourth Sunday in Lent

Reflection By Chris Yaw

Jesus said, “I came into this world for judgment so that those who do not see may see, and those who do see may become blind.”
- John 9:39

A research study was recently done to help people with Multiple Sclerosis (MS). Researchers studied 132 patients with MS, splitting them into two groups. Both learned coping skills. Group #1 learned from respected experts in the field, while Group #2 learned from their peers: five fellow MS patients who had shown an interest in helping fellow sufferers and had undergone special training. The goal was to see which group fared better.

The surprise finding was that neither group fared as well as did the five MS sufferers who had been trained to offer support to Group #2. Researchers noted dramatic changes in how they viewed themselves and their lives. Depression, self-confidence, and self-esteem improved markedly. The study concluded that giving support improved health more than receiving it, with one researcher concluding, “These people had undergone a spiritual transformation that gave them a refreshed view of who they were.”

The idea that compassionately caring for others brings healing for care- givers is as old as it is neglected. When you and I hurt we turn inward, our attention focuses on ourselves, and we don’t naturally think that actively showing compassion to others might benefit us. But it does.

In John 9 we witness an iconic healing scenario, when Jesus has compassion on a blind man, heals him, and causes the upholders of the religious institution great consternation. They simply cannot make sense of Jesus and what he’s trying to do. We see these religious folks choosing pride over humility, prestige over service, and judgment over compassion.

In the introduction to the book, Compassion: A Reflection on the Christian Life, co-author Henri Nouwen points out that compassion comes from two Latin words, which together mean to suffer with. Jesus is pointing out that those who were in a position to suffer with, but chose not to, become subject to negative consequences. Being blind to compassion keeps us from reaping compassion’s rewards, which are none other than healing, restoration, and reconciliation.

In Compassion, Nouwen goes on to write: “Compassion asks us to go where it hurts, to enter into places of pain, to share brokenness, fear, confusion, and anguish. Compassion challenges us to cry out with those in misery, to mourn with those who are lonely, to weep with those in tears. Compassion requires us to be weak with the weak, vulnerable with the vulnerable, and powerless with the powerless. Compassion means full immersion in the condition of being human.”

So, we might ask ...

In what ways are we avoiding compassion, and thus missing out on its benefits?

How are we choosing our own comfort, convenience, and safety over the “suffering with” of others?

How might we better develop compassion in ourselves?

I’d like to share a daily affirmation that helps me stay compassionately present: Have gratitude for the past, compassion for the present, and faith for the future. May it be so.

Closer to Home

Closer to Home

Compassion and Prayer

Reflection By Jan Kwiatkowski

Taking this world as it is and not as I would have it; trusting that You will make all things right if I surrender to Your will.
- Reinhold Niebuhr

Years ago, when I was in parish ministry, members of the church and I were wrestling with what it means to be compassionate, both in our church life, and in our individual lives. We noticed that we often found it easier to discuss people who were distant from us—people with whom we would likely never come in contact—than it was to discuss people and conditions closer to home.

Closer in, we tended to complain about crabby clerks at the grocery checkout, neighbors doing laundry late at night, or the ladies who insisted on using the silverware for coffee hour when those disposable wooden stir sticks would do just fine. We griped about times we were tired because one of our kids was sick and kept us up.

It took us time and reflection to realize that the way we were responding to those close by wasn’t life-giving, for them or for us. And it was a long way from compassion. So we committed to praying regularly for the capacity to extend greater compassion to those with whom we lived and worked and worshipped. And along the way, we gleaned many gifts from our shared practice of compassionate prayer.

One prayer that always opened and softened our minds and hearts was the Serenity Prayer. Part of it is above. The full prayer is on p. 78. I pray that it continues to open our hearts to those closer to home.

Making it Personal: Who is not too far from you that might need prayer and compassion right now? Can you think of a time when you found it more challenging to respond compassionately toward those closer to home?

Holy Women, Wisdom, and Prayer

Holy Women, Wisdom, and Prayer

Compassion and Prayer

Reflection By Robbin Brent

Holy Spirit, giving life to all life, moving all creatures, root of all things, washing them clean, wiping out their mistakes, healing their wounds, you are our true life, luminous, wonderful, awakening the heart from its ancient sleep. Amen.
- St. Hildegard von Bingen

I created a small space in my home years ago where I could pause to pray each day. Just recently I found myself looking at and truly seeing my prayer space, as if for the first time. I’ve placed many treasured items here over the years to remind me of God’s goodness, compassion, and love—an unusual shell, a drawing my grandson made for me, a smooth stone found at an important crossroads in my life, icons of all sorts, flowers, candles, a singing bowl. But what struck me on this particular morning was all of the women who had joined me in the space: Icons of Mary, mother of Jesus; three of Mary Magdalene; Hildegard of Bingen; three women of color modeled on the Rublev Trinity; and a small statue of Kuan Yin, the Tibetan deity of compassion and mercy given to me by my son.

While each is imbued with particular gifts, all serve as models of compassionate devotion, service, faithfulness, love, and healing. All model profound ways of sharing love in the world. Through their steadfast compassionate presence, I have more deeply experienced the fullness of the heart of God.

I want to be more like them. I want to embrace and embody gifts from each in my own life and spiritual journey. While I might not have always seen these holy women with my eyes, I have been blessed by their loving, wise, compassionate companionship every day as I pray.

Making it Personal: I often like to pray using the prayers of holy women, like the one above from Hildegard. Do you have particular prayers you turn to when you pray? Who or what inspires you as you pray? If you have a prayer space, what do you see when you look closely? Who or what might you choose to remind you of God’s compassionate love?

The Merton Prayer

The Merton Prayer

Compassion and Prayer

Reflection By Scott Stoner

I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.
- Thomas Merton

Thomas Merton was a Cistercian monk who wrote prolifically from 1943 to1968 about living a life deeply rooted in prayer and compassion. One of his most popular prayers is known simply as The Merton Prayer. I love this prayer for its humility. It is an honest prayer where Merton, who so many admire as a person of deep faith, acknowledges that sometimes even he feels lost in his desire to follow God. I am moved by the vulnerability and self-compassion he expresses in this prayer.

My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going. / I do not see the road ahead of me. / I cannot know for certain where it will end. / nor do I really know myself, / and the fact that I think I am following your will / does not mean that I am actually doing so. / But I believe that the desire to please you / does in fact please you. / And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. / I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire.

And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road, / though I may know nothing about it. / Therefore will I trust you always though / I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. / I will not fear, for you are ever with me, / and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.

—The Merton Prayer, from Thoughts in Solitude, Copyright © 1956, 1958 by The Abbey of Our Lady of Gethsemani

Making it Personal: In what way does this prayer written by Thomas Merton speak to you? Do you see Merton praying for self-compassion in this prayer? What other connections do you see between this prayer and our theme of compassion?

Prayers Written from the Heart

Prayers Written from the Heart

Compassion and Prayer

Reflection By Robbin Brent

Beloved, help me to know I am never alone. Help me to trust in ever deepening ways that you created me in love to be an instrument of your healing life-giving love and compassion.

When suffering is present, it is natural to ask why it is happening and to wonder where God is in the midst of the pain. Listening deeply in prayer offers us a window into our need to wait for God, trusting in the expanded reality of God’s timing, and trusting that God is always present. This week’s theme inspired me to write a prayer to God, and then to write what I imagine God’s compassionate response might be. It turned out to be a deep and prayerful call and response practice where I listened for guidance, trusting that God also dwells in my imagination. Here is part of my prayer:

Beloved, why is it so hard for me to fully believe that you love me, especially when I am at my lowest ebb, covered over in doubt, anger, and fear? Help me to trust in ever deepening ways that you created me in love to be an instrument of your healing life-giving love and compassion. Help me to know I am never alone. Amen.

Part of the response to my prayer:

Beloved of My Heart, you are growing each and every day in your trust and acceptance of how much I love you. Endlessly, without reserve. Trust that. Even when you suffering. Especially then. You were created in love to be an instrument of my infinite love and compassion. You are never alone. I will never let you go.

If writing a prayer appeals to you, you might begin by prayerfully opening your imagination and listening, trusting that God is there with you. You could also find a prayer that you are drawn to at this point in your life. We have included additional prayers related to compassion on pp. 78–79.

Making it Personal: If you chose to write a prayer to and/or from God, what was the experience like for you? Did you discover anything surprising or insightful in your prayer? If you chose to find a prayer, which one or ones were you drawn to right now?

Being Attentive

Being Attentive

Compassion and Prayer

Reflection By Scott Stoner

Let us be grateful, let us be attentive, let us be open to what has never happened before.
- John Philip Newell

"Pay attention to what you pay attention to” is a saying that is at the heart of many of our Living Compass wellness resources. We know that what we pay attention to is what will grow in our lives. Prayer is one way we direct our attention to focus more on who we want to be and who God wants us to be.

As we explore the connection between prayer and compassion this week, I invite you to focus some attention in your prayer life on praying for compassion. Pray for compassion for yourself, and pray for a deepening of your practice of offering compassion to others.

John Philip Newell is a writer and retreat leader who draws heavily on the wisdom of Celtic Christianity. He has written a beautiful prayer called Presence that I will close with. It is a prayer about presence and being attentive, two crucial aspects of practicing compassion.

In the gift of this new day,
in the gift of the present moment,
in the gift of time and eternity intertwined,
let us be grateful,
let us be attentive,
let us be open to what has never happened before, in the gift of this new day,
in the gift of the present moment,
in the gift of time and eternity intertwined.

—Presence, from Sounds of the Eternal: A Celtic Psalter, 2002

Making it Personal: What speaks to you in this prayer? Do you see a connection between being attentive and being compassionate?

Compassion and Prayer

Compassion and Prayer

Theme for the Week

Reflection By Scott Stoner

Pray as though everything depended on God. Work as though everything depended on you.
- Saint Augustine

When someone shares with me that they are suffering in some way or facing a great challenge, I always try to listen deeply to what they are saying, resisting any urges to offer advice or platitudes. After I feel I have heard them and understand as best I can what they are going through, I often say to them, “I will hold you and your concerns in my prayers.”

This Lent we have learned that compassion involves the awareness of another person’s suffering joined by a desire to alleviate that suffering. Letting someone know that we will pray for them, or that we are praying for them, is a compassionate response because it offers reassurance that no matter what they are going through, they are not alone. It is also true that knowing someone is praying for us can help to ease our own suffering. In this expression of prayer we see a twofold connection between compassion and prayer, the theme for this week’s reflections.

Personally, I know that many times when I have shared with someone that I have been praying for them, they respond by saying that they could feel the prayers. And I find great comfort when I know others are praying for me. This is the mystical power of prayer as a way of offering compassion to someone who is hurting. Compassion and prayer are at the heart of the Christian life. This week we will explore how compassion and prayer are connected and how each informs the other. We have curated and included prayers related to the theme of Practicing Compassion on pp. 78–79.

Making it Personal: What are your initial thoughts about the connection between compassion and prayer? Have you ever felt comforted by knowing that someone was praying for you? Are there people currently for whom you pray regularly?

The Gift of Kindness

The Gift of Kindness

The Third Sunday in Lent

Reflection By Jana Troutman-Miller

Love and kindness are never wasted. They always make a difference. They bless the one who receives them, and they bless you, the giver.
- Barbara De Angelis

Many years ago, while visiting friends in Europe, I experienced one of the most lovely moments of compassion extended to me from a stranger. I had been in Prague several days and was leaving by train to go on to Germany. It was my birthday. At the station, sensing that I was feeling sad about saying goodbye and being alone for the next ten hours on the train, my friends gave me tender hugs and three roses to keep me company—wonderful acts of both kindness and compassion.

Along the way, an older gentleman came on board with a large bundle of at least six-dozen long-stemmed roses. He gently placed the flowers overhead, sat down across from me, and began to chat with the man next to him. After a while he stood up, took down the roses, and gave one to the other man. Then he looked over at me and said something to me in German. When I told him that I didn’t understand, he motioned to my three roses with a questioning look. I realized then what he was asking and I told him that it was my birthday and that my friends gave these to me to help keep me company. He smiled, then carefully selected one of his roses and presented it to me. Deeply moved by his kind, compassionate gesture, I thanked him over and over as I fought back tears. Soon we were at our next stop where the man got off. As he was leaving he told me that he loves being able to do kind things for people to make them happy.

That seemingly small gesture meant so much to me. Without even realizing it until that moment, receiving a rose from this stranger was just what I needed. I also realized that he too had a need met that day. His need was to show kindness and compassion, and that need was met when he gave me the rose and I received it with a heart overflowing with gratitude.

While we all have a desire to give and receive compassion, all too often we don’t allow others to offer us that gift, especially in those moments when we don’t feel worthy to receive someone’s compassion. And so we say some version of, “No, that’s okay, you keep your rose.” When that happens, both of us are deprived of the healing power of kindness and compassion.

But when we allow ourselves to receive kindness and compassion from others, it connects us in deep and profound ways. I still think of this man twenty years later and each time I do, I offer a prayer of gratitude for him. Through this experience I continue to be reminded to look for those moments when God invites me to be with another in a time of need, or allowing them to be present for me in my time of need. This man’s simple act of compassionate kindness has continued to offer me the healing gift of happiness for many years, and I pray it continues to offer that healing gift to him, as well.

What Can Jesus Do for You?

What Can Jesus Do for You?

Compassion and Listening

Reflection By Jan Kwiatkowski

Come to me, all you that are weary and are carrying heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.
- Matthew 11:28

Many years ago, I spoke with my pastor about some challenging medical things our family was facing. I hadn’t gone into the conversation looking for something specific; I was just updating him on what was happening. As he always did, he listened deeply and patiently, giving me all the time I needed. He was listening, not only to what I was saying, but also to what I might have left unsaid. Once I was finished, we sat for a few moments in silence, and then he looked at me, noting how tired I was, and asked a seemingly simple question: “What can Jesus do for you?”

I was more than a little thrown by his question. The initial knee-jerk response I heard in my head was “I have no idea,” which was joined by numerous other things simultaneously running through my mind. “Jesus do something for me? Jesus is my role model, guide, teacher, and faithful companion. Isn’t that enough? Besides, I’ve got too much to do and think about and worry about to be spending time and energy wondering what I need. Why should I bother Jesus with what I need when it seems minimal compared to the needs of so many others in the world?”

Despite all that going on in my head, I left that day without giving my pastor much of an answer, yet I’ve continued to revisit and respond to his question many times since then. Experience has taught me that when I allow my heart to know and speak its deepest needs, there is a compassionate, close-to-my-heart Jesus who hears. I’ve come to understand that to practice self-compassion is to accept a gift from a Jesus who hears, knows, and generously offers what my heart most needs.

Making it Personal: What was your initial response to the question, “What can Jesus do for you”? How do you understand the relationship between listening and self-compassion? What can Jesus do for you?

Listening with the Ears of Our Heart

Listening with the Ears of Our Heart

Compassion and Listening

Reflection By Robbin Brent

The greatest thing you can do in this life is to cultivate and exercise compassion. Life is about learning how to flow with your basic goodness. It’s about entering the heart and making it the fount of your being.
- Robert Lax

I get so much pleasure from watching and listening to my grandchildren play. They seem instinctively to listen with the ears of their heart, engaging and responding wholeheartedly to the world around them.

Perhaps they are infused with joy and boundless energy because they don’t spend precious energy overthinking their experience. They simply take it in, reveling in all of God’s creation. Just as children do naturally, how can we learn to better listen with the ears of our heart?

One way we can learn to listen like a child is by showing up in the present moment and paying attention, being curious rather than judgmental. That quality of open, kind presence creates a spaciousness in which we can learn to see and hear with the eyes of our heart, from love, not fear.

Paul also provides some useful tips. “Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances” (1 Thess. 5:16-18). When we cultivate joy, a regular prayer practice, and a commitment to notice what we are most grateful for each day, we learn how to move beneath the level of the mind to listen from a place of love, kindness, and deep compassion. From this place we get a richer sense of what it is like to be deeply and truly seen, heard, and loved by God. From this place we infuse our lives, and the lives of others, with the infinite joyful love of God.

Making it Personal: What do you think of the idea that we can better hear what matters most when we listen with the ears of our heart? Do you think Paul’s wise counsel—expressing joy, praying often, and looking for what we are most grateful each day—might support your desire to listen from your heart rather than simply your head? If so, what is one that you are ready to practice regularly this Lent?

Learning from the Good Samaritan

Learning from the Good Samaritan

Compassion and Listening

Reflection By Scott Stoner

“Which of these three, do you think, was a neighbour to the man who fell into the hands of the robbers?” He said, “The one who showed him mercy.” Jesus said to him, “Go and do likewise.”
- Luke 10:36-37

The story of the Good Samaritan from the tenth chapter of Luke is one of the best-known teachings of Jesus about compassion. In this parable, a man has been beaten up and left for dead by the side of the road. A priest and a Levite both see the man and pass by him, not wanting to get involved. Then the Samaritan comes by, chooses to respond fully to the man, and offers him what he needs to heal.

Many factors are involved in this story of compassion, but it all starts with someone being willing to listen. Like the first two men, we too at times choose to walk around the suffering of another, not wanting to be a witness to what they are experiencing, perhaps because it makes us uncomfortable. To truly listen to another’s suffering is to risk getting close to their pain and allowing ourselves to feel it. When we listen in that sincere way, we may find ourselves moved so deeply that we can no longer merely walk on by. Once we learn what they need, we may be moved to show compassion.

The Good Samaritan is a model for all of us of what it means to not ignore or walk around the pain of another, of what it means to choose to listen and respond with compassion.

Making it Personal: As you reflect today, you might want to reread the parable found in Luke 10:25-37. How does the Parable of the Good Samaritan speak to you about listening and compassion? Is there a particular person or situation that God is calling you to listen to and offer compassion to, perhaps one that initially makes you uncomfortable?

Listening beneath the Surface

Listening beneath the Surface

Compassion and Listening

Reflection By Robbin Brent

Today, and all the days of my life, grant me the strength to examine my heart. May I be faithful, God, to your gift of truth in me.
- Beverly Lanzetta

As we practice compassionate listening, we are better able to listen beneath surface emotions and appearances to the deeper places where we, and others, are hurting. Prayerful listening from that deeper place opens our hearts and minds to the pain and distress, our own and others, that otherwise might go unnoticed. Listening deeply to sorrow however it shows up in our lives and relationships is an important step on our journey of practicing compassion.

One spiritual prayer practice that can enhance our ability to listen is the Daily Examen. While we can apply this practice to any area of our lives, we can use it in a particular way to help us pay attention to where God may be guiding us in our practice of deep listening (the full practice is on pp. 80–81). First, we sit quietly as we listen for God. Then, looking back over the day, we notice times when we felt most alive and thank God for those moments; times when we felt the least grateful and offer those with thanks to God; times when we offered or received, or weren’t able to offer or receive, the gift of compassionate listening; and finally, we notice moments when we either felt aligned with, or far from, living out God’s purpose for our lives and offer these to God too.

One of the gifts of this practice is that it strengthens our ability to be fully present with ourselves as we listen for God. This, in turn, strengthens our ability to listen to others in a loving, kind, and generous way that reflects our desire, with God’s help, to respond compassionately as we are able.

Making it Personal: If you engaged with the Daily Examen practice, were you surprised by anything that came up around your willingness to practice compassionate listening? Any new ah-ha’s, insights, or inspiration? Is there anything you feel ready to do based on what you learned from this practice?

Compassionate Listening

Compassionate Listening

Compassion and Listening

Reflection By Scott Stoner

I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.
- Maya Angelou

We all have had the experience of someone pretending to listen to us but whose mind is obviously elsewhere. A common example is when we are at a group gathering, and the person we are talking with is busy looking over our shoulder for whomever they want to talk to next. Or when we respond honestly when someone asks us how we are doing and they quickly change the subject because they don’t actually want to hear what might be unsettling to them. Neither of these experiences, as you might imagine, helps to make the speaker feel valued and connected.

On the other hand, most of us have likely had the experience of sharing something painful and having someone offer us the gift of their full attention, of being truly present to us. In those moments, the gift of their compassionate listening makes us feel valued and connected.

All of us know someone who could benefit from the gift of our deep listening to them right now. Perhaps they are going through a difficult time or are feeling alone. Maybe they are going through a big life transition and are feeling unsure. Perhaps they are excited about something, but nervous at the same time. As we focus this week on listening and compassion, I wonder how things might change if each of us could reach out to someone we know who could benefit from our listening and compassion.

When we offer the gift of compassionate listening to others, to paraphrase Maya Angelou, they may not remember anything we say or do, but they will always remember how they felt deeply seen, heard, and cared for.

Making it Personal: Can you think of a time when you felt someone’s compassion simply because they deeply listened to you? How did that make you feel? To whom might you offer the gift of being fully attentive and compassionately listening today?

Compassion and Listening

Compassion and Listening

Theme for the Week

Reflection By Scott Stoner

God is love. So the Spirit counsels us, guides us toward compassion in all the complex and varied circumstances of our lives.
- Jake Owensby

For this week’s theme, we will explore how our capacity to be compassionate is deeply connected with our ability to listen. We begin with the premise that compassion always starts with listening. In fact, a compassionate response is not possible without first listening.

The reflection for February 24 introduced this definition of compassion: “Compassion is sympathetic consciousness of others’ distress together with a desire to alleviate it.” To become conscious of another person’s distress, we must be willing to first deeply listen to them, attempting to understand what they are experiencing.

If we don’t first make an effort to deeply hear another person’s struggle, our response will often fall short of being compassionate and may not be at all comforting to the other person. Imagine, for example, that a friend is telling me they were just down-sized out of a job they loved and had been doing for a long time. They describe how upset they are and wonder if they will ever be able to find a job they love as much. If I am only half paying attention and not really taking in what this all means to them, I might offer a less-than-helpful response, such as, “Don’t worry, I’m sure you will find another job soon, given how strong the job market is right now.”

In this example, my response is not compassionate because I do not truly listen to nor honor the depth of grief my friend is expressing. In fact, rather than offering relief for my friend’s suffering, I might instead be adding to it as now they also feel unheard and alone.

Making it Personal: What are your initial thoughts about the connection between compassion and listening? Can you think of a time when someone shared their pain with you and you only half-listened? If so, did that affect your ability to respond with compassion?

Connected to the Source

Connected to the Source

The Second Sunday in Lent

Reflection By Jake Owensby

What we are asked to do is to love, and this love itself will render both ourselves and our neighbors worthy.
- Thomas Merton

They didn’t have to take us in. Strictly speaking, it was risky. Mom and I were strangers to them. Nothing more than distant friends of a distant friend. B- and his wife R- were retired. Pushing their mid-seventies.

Our options were slim. We would either sleep under their roof or huddle in our battered car. So the old couple invited us to stay the night.

Their house was small and worn by time and weather. Mom got the spare room. I slept on a cot in the dining room. This was home for about a month.

Our hosts fed us and helped my mother get a job. Eventually, they found us a temporary, rent-free place of our own until we could get back on our feet.

I was eleven years old.

At the time, all I could feel was shame. Being poor and homeless is tough on the soul. It gnawed away at my sense of self-worth and dignity.

I cannot describe the transformative effect of having two strangers welcome me into their home and invite me to call them Aunt and Uncle. But I can tell you what that power is called. It’s called compassion. And I believe that I know where that power comes from.

Jesus once said that you have to be born from above to see the kingdom of heaven. Jesus was saying that we can live a God-connected life. Later in John’s Gospel Jesus promised that, after his resurrection and ascension, he would send the Holy Spirit to dwell in us. The very presence of God within us can be our primary motiving force and our navigational principle.

God is love. So the Spirit counsels us, guides us toward compassion in all the complex and varied circumstances of our lives. It’s as if Jesus is our mentor in what love looks like in the different situations we find ourselves.

When we share any act of compassion, we might change another person’s life. B- and R- certainly did that for me. But it’s also true that we change the world in ways that we cannot see from our limited perspective.

It all comes down to the source of compassion. Our acts of love arise from God’s infinite love, whether we realize it or not. Your actions may seem small and even insignificant to you. But God is weaving together all our desires and small sacrifices and kindnesses and moments of tenderness. And through them God is mending the world.

The Willingness to Give and to Receive

The Willingness to Give and to Receive

Compassion and Faith

Reflection By Jan Kwiatkowski

For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
- Romans 8:38-39

Assuring those facing the end of life that nothing could separate them from God’s love was part of many conversations I frequently had with the dying. These conversations were especially powerful with those who were seeking forgiveness and relief for the guilt and shame they had been carrying for many years.

Many I tended to in hospice were terrified to die because they had accepted and internalized either what they had told themselves, or what was told to them by significant others. Whether intentionally or unintentionally, they, or others, had pointed toward misdeeds in order to prove they were inherently flawed and unworthy of God’s compassionate love. Judgmental words perhaps intended as correction became barriers not only to their ability to experience God’s compassion, but also to the compassion they were withholding from themselves. What I’ve found essential to remind those for whom I have cared was beautifully expressed by Scott Stoner last Monday: “Our capacity to offer compassion to others is directly related to our ability to open ourselves to receiving God’s compassion for ourselves.”

As we close this first week in Lent where we focused on the relationship between our faith and compassion, I invite us to reflect on how our faith supports our willingness to receive God’s compassion, as well as our willingness to extend compassion to ourselves. When we are willing to receive the gift of compassion, we have a gift we can then offer to others.

Making it Personal: What, if anything, might be a barrier to your willingness to accept compassion, from God, others, or yourself? Having reflected on faith and compassion this week, how has your understand- ing of your faith and your willingness to both receive and to offer compassion changed or deepened?

From Belief to Faith

From Belief to Faith

Compassion and Faith

Reflection By Robbin Brent

Faith is taking the first step even when you can’t see the whole stairway.
- The Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

During his service in the military, my youngest son was part of two airborne divisions, which meant he often was required to jump out of aircraft and descend at a very quick clip in order to avoid being detected. The army has a formula for how many feet per second a soldier can drop and still land (mostly) intact. It is very fast. In order to do this, he first had to believe that his parachute would keep him safe, and then he had to place his faith in it by jumping. This is one of the distinctions between belief and faith. I might believe that parachutes work, but would not put my faith in one by jumping out of an airplane. He believed and then acted out of his belief. That is faith.

Both faith and compassion are used together many hundreds of times throughout Scripture to describe great love, deeply felt and then expressed through acts of steadfast lovingkindness, mercy, goodness, and faithfulness. As Dr. King expressed so well in the quote above, while we often have no idea of the ways in which our compassion matters, we are called to have faith that we are the visible heart and arms of God at work in the world. We make a commitment to act on our belief in a God of love, trusting that even when we don’t, God knows where we are going.

It is our faith in God, expressed through our willingness to act on what we believe, that prepares our minds and hearts to respond compassionately to suffering, our own, others, and the world’s.

Making it Personal: How do you experience the relationship between your beliefs, your faith, and your ability to respond compassionately? Jesus is just one example from Scripture of someone who remained true to his beliefs by living a life of faithfulness and compassion. Can you think of others? How might they inspire your own journey of faith?

God of Compassion and Healing

God of Compassion and Healing

Compassion and Faith

Reflection By Scott Stoner

Sing for joy, O heavens, and exult, O earth; break forth, O mountains, into singing! For the Lord has comforted his people, and will have compassion on his suffering ones.
-Isaiah 49:13

There is a common misunderstanding about compassion and God that many of us, myself included, were taught at one point. This is the idea that the God of the Old Testament is angry, even vengeful, and that the God of the New Testament is a God of love and compassion. Like many simplistic dichotomies, this is neither true nor helpful. For example, see the passage above from the Old Testament book of Isaiah.

The idea of being afraid of God’s wrath is not just something attributed to the Old Testament. I also find that many people have a fear-based image of God that often includes a fear that God will punish them for something they have done. As a priest, when a person is experiencing suffering or misfortune, I often hear some version of the question, “I wonder what I did to deserve this?”

I do not believe that the God of compassion we worship and follow ever intentionally harms people. At the same time, God does not save us from the natural consequences of our choices. While God is never the cause of our suffering, God is always moved to join us in our hurt and to be a part of our healing if we are open to that. No matter the source of our suffering, I believe God always responds with love and compassion.

Making it Personal: Are you aware of any fearful thoughts you have of God, perhaps thinking of God as vengeful? What do you think of the idea that God is never the cause of our suffering but is always with us in that suffering and is always a part of our healing?

Grammar of Faith

Grammar of Faith

Compassion and Faith

Reflection By Robbin Brent

The Lord, the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness.
- Exodus 34:6 (NIV)

Engaging with the theme of compassion has transformed my understanding and awareness of God’s great love and hope for us. That God is always turned toward us and always ready to respond because of God’s ever-present, unconditional, healing love.

The passage above from Exodus contain the first self-describing words God uses in the Bible. And these same words are repeated many hundreds of times throughout the Old and New Testaments. I was surprised to learn that at their root (Hebrew and Greek), these words—compassion, mercy, faithfulness, lovingkindness, goodness, forgiveness, healing, trust, and womb—all come from the same origins. The connection between some of the essential vocabulary of our faith allows us to get a sense of the awe-inspiring relational dynamism of God’s participation at every step of the way on our journey of faith.

These words are meant to be understood collectively, as strands of a wholistic, unitive relational web, much like the web of a spider. These silk weavers spin webs that are strong (some stronger than steel), life-giving, and resilient, as each strand of the web is created for a specific purpose. They spin strands to wrap the eggs of their unborn. They spin strands to anchor themselves so if they fall, they don’t fall too far. These sensitive strands sustain them by alerting them through vibration to the presence of food. The silk is their source of nourishment, protection, growth, and flourishing, just as the compassionate web of God—created out of an infinite array of strands—holds, nourishes, protects, and sustains all of creation.

Making it Personal: Do the connections between the words mentioned above expand or deepen your understanding of God’s loving compassionate presence in the world? Describe in what ways. Are there other words you would add?