Wrestling with Compassion
Ash Wednesday
Reflection By Jennifer Baskerville-Burrows
Create in me a clean heart, O God,
and renew a right spirit within me.
- Psalm 51:11, Book of Common Prayer, p. 266
As a lover of fountain pens, pencils, and smooth paper beautifully bound, it is nearly impossible for me to pass a stationary store without going in. You know, just to look. Every new pen or journal is an opportunity to begin again, start over, and dream on paper. In the second year of the COVID-19 pandemic, I packed up a brand new journal and my running gear to attend a running retreat that included a workshop on journaling. My running coach led the workshop and reminded me of the practice of ending each day by jotting down just a few things for which I was grateful. Gratitude journals have been around forever, but being reminded of the practice helped me avoid feeling stuck or frustrated with my running and—more importantly—with my life. Surely I could find something to be grateful for beyond thanking God for living to see another day.
The theme of this year’s Living Compass Lenten Devotional is Practicing Compassion with All Your Heart, Soul, Strength, and Mind. It is just now occurring to me that I can’t ever remember seeing a “compassion journal” on the shelves of the book and stationery stores I frequent. There are no “compassion journal workshops” offered with any frequency. As we live with the trauma of surviving a global pandemic and its cascading effects on mental health, healthcare, housing, employment, the supply chain, and the economy, not to mention the additional tragedies caused by climate change, natural disasters, and political divisions, many of us may be teetering on the edge of compassion fatigue—if we haven’t already succumbed.
But Lent is a chance to wrestle with compassion once more. The 40 days that begin today give us the opportunity to reflect on the ways we participate in the suffering and brokenness of the world while holding ourselves and others with love and compassion as we seek healing. What if the journey with Jesus to the cross and tomb was an opportunity to dwell in the gaze of the one who looks upon us all with compassion and love? Imagine keeping a “compassion journal,” noting the small and large gestures of compassion offered and received?
Like gratitude, it takes practice to be gentle and kind to oneself and others we meet each day. Practicing compassion need not be another “should” to inspire guilt, nor a pursuit that requires special equipment—not even pens and journals. Simply praying for the awareness of God’s loving gaze that is cast upon the hurting and vulnerable, even and especially ourselves, is one way to begin. May you be blessed by this Lenten journey with our compassionate and loving God.