Being There Matters
Compassion and Mercy
Reflection By Jan Kwiatkowski
At the cross her station keeping, stood the mournful Mother weeping, close to Jesus to the last.
- from the hymn At the Cross Her Station Keeping, written by Jacopone da Todi; translation by Edward Caswall
On Thursday, Scott Stoner explored the Seven Acts of Mercy and how they offer specific ways we can offer compassion and mercy to those who are suffering in ways visible, tangible, and obvious. As a therapist and pastor, in addition to the visible suffering of others, I also encounter the not-so-obvious pain of anxiety, fear, loss, depression, hopelessness, and loneliness.
Our society values being anything but vulnerable. Admitting our own need for mercy and compassion and recognizing countless quiet cries for mercy and compassion around us are counter-cultural and yet what our world so desperately needs. Compounding this issue, those silenced and often-shamed people suffering from anxiety, fear, loss, depression, hopelessness, and loneliness often hide in ways that make it hard for others to respond to with compassion and mercy. In these situations, it is important to remember that even when we don’t see a way of responding concretely to the needs of those quietly suffering, the gift of being present is enough.
Just a few stood at the foot of the cross, not able to do anything other than be there. Standing at the foot of the cross and holding each other and the dying Lord of Life in compassionate mercy and presence is an example beyond words of the value of our presence and compassion.
Making it Personal: Describe a time when the only thing you could do was to be present and what that was like for you. Has there been a time when someone was there for you during a dark time in your life? What was that like for you? If there is someone in your life who might be open to the mercy of compassionate presence, what might be a simple way you could be present for them?