Choosing What Clothes to Wear
Healing and Wholeness in Relationships
Reflection By Scott Stoner
As God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience.
- Colossians 3:12
One misconception about love is that love is primarily a feeling. That’s what many songs and greeting cards would lead us to think. The reality, though, is that love is mainly a decision.
Feelings ebb and flow in all relationships. Sometimes we feel warmth and joy, while other times we feel hurt or irritation. A Christian approach to love transcends feelings and grounds our love in the teachings of our faith and our core values.
When we view love as a decision grounded in our understanding of Jesus’ teachings, the above passage from Colossians becomes more understandable. Just as we decide what clothes to put on each day, we are called to make the decision to clothe ourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience. What we “wear” each day is a choice we have in our relationships, independent from the current state of our feelings. None of us does this perfectly, but we continue to be faithful to cultivating a wholehearted commitment to love, even in difficult moments.
Making It Personal: What do you think of the idea that love is primarily a decision? Is there one particular attribute in the Colossians passage that speaks to you right now? If so, how might you decide to put that into practice right now?