The Church of Cubs Baseball

In the 1988 movie Bull Durham, Annie Savoy, one of the lead characters (played by Susan Sarandon) refers to the "Church of Baseball" with these  words:      "I believe in the Church of Baseball. I've tried all the major religions, and most of the minor ones. I've worshipped Buddha, Allah, Brahma, Vishnu, Siva, trees, mushrooms, and Isadora Duncan. I know things. For instance, there are 108 beads in a Catholic rosary and there are 108 stitches in a baseball... It's a long season and you gotta trust. I've tried 'em all, I really have, and the only church that truly feeds the soul, day in, day out, is the Church of Baseball."

For those of us who are Chicago Cubs fans there is a special version of the Church of Baseball, one that has required patience and an enduring sense of hopefulness.  Now as we celebrate the Cubs playing in their first World Series since 1945, we give special thanks for what it means to be a faithful member of the Church of Cubs Baseball with a new hopefulness few of us could even imagine just a few years ago.

I joined this "church" when my wife and I moved to the Chicago area for me to go to seminary in the late 1970's.  We lived there for ten years altogether and I have been a faithful Cubs fan ever since, cheering them on year after year, regardless of their place in the standings. Back then all the  games at Wrigley Field were day games as there were no lights yet and so the games regularly conflicted with my seminary classes. This created an ongoing conflict regarding which "church" I was going to attend on any given day. Its fair to say that my fellow students and I divided our attendance fairly equally during baseball season between seminary classes and the church located at the corner of Addison and Clark, Wrigley Field.

Even if you are not a member of our Chicago Cubs "church" I am happy to share some of the spiritual lessons we die-hards have learned and practiced for decades.

Perseverance and Patience

Most churches teach the importance of perseverance and patience, of believing and keeping the faith, day in and day out, even when the fruits of doing so are not immediately obvious. The Church of Cubs Baseball excels in teaching these lessons. We Cub fans have kept the faith since our last World Series victory of 1908. We keep being patient and believing always that this year will be the year we will finally win the elusive World Series. We believe that one of these years, perhaps even this year, our faithfulness and patience will pay off.

The Importance of Community

All churches (and other faith communities) stress the importance of community. We are stronger together and we can better face the difficulties of life with the support of one another. Comfort those who need comforting and cheer together when there is reason to cheer. How else could we Cub fans have endured all these years?

Honor Your Elders and Those Who Came Before You                                            

Churches also regularly give thanks for the "communion of saints" who have gone before us, for those whom "we love, but see no longer." And so it is for those of us who remember and give thanks for saints such as Ernie Banks, Ron Santo, Jack Brickhouse, and Harry Caray. Countless Cubs fans have sacred memories of going to Wrigley Field with our parents and grandparents, many who have passed away having never seen a winning team, and know they are with them in spirit watching every pitch, particularly now in  this World Series.

Humility

We have had plenty of practice with this spiritual virtue.  It comes naturally for all Cubs fans. In fact, we are really not quite sure how to act in response to our relatively new found success. We, who are used to being "the doormat of the National League," are not used to these winning ways. Over the years you certainly wouldn't find many Cubs fans who were boastful or arrogant, because they simply didn't have much to boast about. Even now most Cub fans are happy and grateful, but not boastful, as they know things can change in a minute and nothing is guaranteed.

So enjoy the World Series, learning all you can from this great sport. And even if it's just for this week, I invite you to join the Church of Cubs Baseball. Come cheer and pray for our Cubbies. Like any other church, we are always open to welcoming new members. If we lose, we will continue our lessons in the practice of humility, patience, and perseverance, and honoring our elders. And if somehow the Chicago Cubs win it all, every one of us we will have the opportunity to witness first hand a core teaching of the Christian faith.

     And the first shall be last, and the last shall be first.

Go Cubs Go!

When Breath Becomes Air

It had been a long time since I read an entire book in one sitting, but that is what happened this past week.  Having read it through all at once, I already want to reread Paul Kalanathi's When Breath Becomes Air -it is that compelling.  The book is a memoir of a young neurosurgeon who is diagnosed with stage four lung cancer.  After many years of facing the possibility of death with his patients, the roles are suddenly reversed as the doctor now becomes the patient, the one who is facing his own mortality. Apparently, I am not the only one who has been touched by this memoir.  The book has been on the New York Times' bestseller list for the past thirty-nine weeks.  Here's how a few others have described Dr. Kalanithi's story.

"It split my head open with its beauty." Cheryl Strayed

"This is one of a handful of books I consider to be a universal donor-I would recommend it to anyone, everyone."  Ann Patchett

"Rattling, heartbreaking, and ultimately beautiful, the too-young Dr. Kalanithi's memoir is proof that the dying are the ones who have the most to teach us about life." Atul Gawande

As readers  find out on page one Dr. Kalanathi dies after a several year battle with his cancer. The book documents his profound emotional and spiritual journey from the time of his diagnosis to the time of his death.  The book is unflinching in its honesty and you will cry tears of sadness and tears of joy as you read it.  While the book does not have a "happy ending" it has a profound ending that leaves us all better prepared to think and talk about death. The author's wife, also a doctor, writes a touching epilogue to the book.   I would highly recommend reading this book and discussing it with others as it has the potential to open up honest and vulnerable conversations about death, that part of life each of us will eventually confront at some time in the future. We, and all of the people we know and love, are all going to die someday, and so the investment of time in reading this book and discussing it with others will greatly enhance your ability to face that reality when it comes.

Because I am not able to truly explain the power of or to improve on the words from the author himself, I close with some excerpts from this beautiful book, When Breath Becomes Air.  If you decide to read this book, or if you already have, I would love to hear your reaction to. (You can share your reaction by simply replying to this email.)

"There a moment, a cusp, when the sum of gathered experience is worn down by the details of living.  We are never so wise as when we live in this moment."

"The physician's duty is not to stave off death or return patients to their old lives, but to take into our arms a patient and family whose lives have disintegrated and work until they can stand back up and face, and make sense of, their own existence."

"Science may provide the most useful way to organize empirical, reproducible data, but its power to do so is predicated on its inability to grasp the most central aspects of human life: hope, fear, love, hate, beauty, envy, honor, weakness striving, suffering, virtue."

"Those burdens are what make medicine holy and wholly impossible: in taking up another's cross, one must sometimes get crushed by the weight."

"Openness to human relationality does not mean revealing grand truths from the apse; it means meeting patients where they are, in the narthex or nave, and bringing them as far as you can."

Words Create Worlds

     As many of you may already know, Bob Dylan, won the Nobel Prize for Literature this week. As someone who has listened to his music and over the years has studied almost all of his song lyrics, I am not surprised. When the award was announced this week in Sweden, it was noted that Dylan was receiving recognition for "having created new poetic expressions within the great American song tradition." The words of his songs have been listened to  and have influenced millions of people world wide for over fifty years. His words, along with the words of all great poets and writers, are proof of the power of words to alter our moods, change our way of thinking, and ultimately effect how we act.  

     Words create worlds because language impacts how we think and act. Not just Mr.Dylan's, but our words as well. If you need proof of the power of words to create your world, simply note the difference between greeting another person, or a group of people with words of appreciation and gratitude versus greeting them with a shaming or degrading comment. What different worlds would you create with these different words?   

     October is Domestic Violence Awareness month. This provides us with another opportunity to think about the power of how words create worlds. Domestic violence obviously includes physical and sexual violence and aggression, but it also includes verbal abuse and intimidation. Verbal abuse, using words to objectify, shame, control, and degrade another person, shows a powerful negative way that words create worlds. Any language that creates a world where it is okay to use or objectify another person is never okay. Hopefully, "the times they are a-changing" in regard to our consciousness about how we honor and respect one another with our words. The time has come to stop minimizing the harmful power of words, and for no one to excuse verbal, as well as physical abuse, by anyone - ever.

     The words that you and I speak on any given day won't be heard by millions of people. They will however be heard, by the people in our immediate circles of influence. They will, in fact, greatly influence the kind of worlds we create for ourselves, our families, friends, colleagues, and our communities. May we choose our words wisely, guided by a desire for love, compassion, and justice. And may we have the courage to speak out against any words that try to normalize a culture of objectifying and abusing others, whenever and where ever we encounter them. It is in these small acts of speaking up against any violence towards others that we can co-create a better world.

    We can all take a clue from Mr. Dylan and choose our words carefully and wisely. We can think about how we want to say things, planning out our words before we speak about important thoughts and feelings. We may not win any awards with our words, but we can use them to create a more loving and just world, and in the end that is more important than any prize any of us could ever hope to win.

    I close with these uplifting words from Bob Dylan's song Forever Young (1973). As you read these words, it might be helpful to think of the idea of staying forever young as staying forever open to growing in self-awareness about how we speak to and treat one another.  

May you grow up to be righteous

May you grow up to be true

May you always know the truth

And see the lights surrounding you

May you always be courageous

Stand upright and be strong

May you stay forever young

Curiosity

Curious George turned 75 last month. It was in the fall of 1941 that the first Curious George book was published by H.A. (Hans) and Margret Rey. There were seven books in the “Original Adventures” series published between 1941 and 1966, and the number of these seven books sold has since then topped 30 million copies. The books are so popular that they have never been out of print. Other books that feature Curious George have also been published and those, too, have sold over millions of copies. Add to that a beloved full length movie and an ever popular Curious George show on PBS KIDS and you can see why people are excited to be celebrating the birthday of this beloved monkey. Did you enjoy reading Curious George books as a kid? Do or did you read them to your children or grandchildren? Having a now three year old grand child I am enjoying seeing a third generation within my own family enjoying the instant appeal of these books. Young children, like George, cannot help but be curious. They are constantly exploring, questioning, wondering, and wanting to know why the sky is blue, and and why tomatoes are red, and why leaves fall off trees, and why water freezes in winter, and why birds can fly, and why, why, why……

PBS KIDS has broadcast an animated television series based on the Curious George children’s book series since 2006. PBS’s interest in the show from the start was not simply to entertain children, but to educate them about the value of being curious and inquisitive. Curiosity is the natural first step of the desire to learn more and is a crucial factor in gaining a deeper understanding of how things work in the world and for exploring new ways of solving problems.

This makes curiosity as important an attribute for adults as it is for children. Somewhere along the line though, as we get older, we adults sometimes lose the natural curiosity we had as children. When I work with an individual, couple, or family who is “stuck” in some way, I almost always find that they have lost their ability to be curious about their life together. When this is the case, I find that I am almost always able to help them get “unstuck” by simply being curious. We wonder together why they are stuck. We dig deep tougher and continue to wonder why. To gain a deeper understanding of what is going on we work together to ask “why?” and to explore new ways of solving a problem. That’s right, we just follow the lead of Curious George and any young child by continuously asking why, and always exploring new ways of doing things.

It's worth noting here that word curious comes from the same root as the words cure and care. To be curious is to care enough to get to know others for who they really are, rather than simply assuming we already know who they are, or what they mean by a certain action or statement. Think for a moment how wonderfully caring it feels when others are curious enough to take the time to really get to know you and who you really are. That simple curiosity on their part is a way of caring.

So the next time you are feeling stuck, try taking a step back and being curious about both how you got stuck and about new and creative ways you might try to get unstuck. In doing so you will be honoring Curious George’s 75th anniversary while you are also reconnecting with the natural, child-like curiosity that lives within each and every one of us.

Arnie's Army of Kindness

When I was growing up my father told me many memorable stories, including one that I remember about the time a famous celebrity did him an unexpected favor. As the story goes, my father, having just returned from his service in World War II, was in line at a nightclub with a friend in New York City hoping they could get in to see an up and coming singing star. When they finally got to the front of the line, they discovered there was an expensive cover charge, steeper than they could afford. Feeling somewhat embarrassed, they explained to the bouncer that they had just returned from the war and didn't have enough money to get in. The bouncer listened politely, but responded that he couldn't make exceptions for anyone. It turned out though, that the singer they had come to hear was nearby and overheard the conversation. Surprising everyone, he stepped in and said, "These two gentlemen are my guests tonight, please let them in." Before he went on stage, that soon to be famous  singer escorted them to a table in the front of the club and bought them both a couple of drinks. That singer was the young Frank Sinatra, and my father clearly never forgot the favor that he did for him and his friend that night. That story came back to me this week as I read stories about the passing of Arnold Palmer. Almost all of the stories I read began with statements similar to, "I was a young, unknown reporter...," or "I was just an everyday, average fan...," or "I was an amateur golfer, trying to catch a break....," and ended with "and Mr. Palmer made time for me, gave me his full attention and talked with me like I was the most important person in the world."  In other words, what people were remembering most about Arnold Palmer were his everyday kindnesses, and not so much his accomplishments on the golf course.  If you want to know more about "Arnie's Army of kindness" learn about the wonderful work of his foundation at www.ArniesArmy.org.

It has been said that you can tell a great deal about a person's character by the way they treat those who likely will be in a position to offer them something in return. The Bible says something similar when it says that a person's character is revealed in how they treat "the least of these" among us. Treating others with kindness because we hope to get something in return is a function of our ego. Treating others with kindness as a reflection of our character, and because it is simply the right thing to do, is an expression of our soul.

Our character is best reflected not often in grand, public gestures and achievements, but in the everyday choices we make to simply do the right thing. It is reflected in being there for a friend who is battling depression, cancer, grief, or some other difficulty.  It is reflected by a parent who is getting up for the fourth time in the middle of the night to comfort a crying child. It is reflected in the way a family member cares for an aging spouse/parent/sibling/friend. It is reflected in the person who volunteers each week at the after school tutoring program or the weekly meal program.

Just yesterday, while in the midst of working on this column, I encountered an older man in the hallway outside my office who appeared to be lost and confused. It turned out that he was trying to find his way to a doctor's office. I took the time to escort him to the office, learned his name as we were walking together, and went into the waiting room to introduce him to the person at the front desk. His deep expression of gratitude, for my five minutes of kindness, "You made my day, Sir!" turned out to be the highlight of my day.  I am embarrassed to say, though, that if I had not been working on this column, I may have simply been too "busy" to even notice this man, let alone stop and ask him if he needed help. I can't help but wonder how many times I have rushed by someone in need of assistance, not even noticing their presence.

You and I may not be famous celebrities like Frank Sinatra and Arnold Palmer, and yet, famous or not, we all have countless opportunities to be kind to others.

Whose day will you make today by taking time to notice them and giving them your undivided time and attention?