The Importance of Pausing

Earlier this week I read an article that gave advice on how to practice mindful eating on Thanksgiving Day.  The holiday has now passed, but but I would like to reflect on two highlights from the article that provide helpful advice for living mindfully as we now enter into the potentially stressful holiday season. The first point the article made about eating mindfully was the importance of pausing on a regular basis while eating a big meal.  The “Eating Pause,” as the article referred to it, is important because it takes time for our brains and bodies to realize that they have had enough to eat.  If we fail to take an “Eating Pause” from time to time, we are likely to eat too much, only realizing that we have over eaten when we finally stop.

This struck me as good advice, and a good metaphor, for how to live during the next four weeks.  To live mindfully, we need to remember to create times to pause, times to reflect on whether we are trying to do too much, buy too much, or eat too much.  Creating “living pauses” will help us to not arrive at Christmas  “stuffed” and exhausted.

The second point the article made was how important it is to learn to recognize one’s “hunger signals.”  This is related to the “Eating Pause” as it helps us to listen more closely to our bodies and to separate out true hunger signals from other feelings, ones that may drive us to eat more than we really want or need.

Again, this is great advice for living mindfully through the holiday season.  Take some time now to listen to your own “hunger signals.”  I know for myself that what I really hunger for this time of year cannot be satisfied by something bought at a shopping mall or by filling up my schedule with a multitude of activities.  I know that my deepest hunger is for spiritual, emotional, and relational connection and satisfaction.

Whether you chose to eat mindfully or not on Thanksgiving, I invite you now to join me in living mindfully as we approach Christmas, which is just four weeks away.  Taking time to pause and recognize what will feed our deepest hungers is what will help us create a meaningful holiday season, one where we are not uncomfortably full, but are indeed well satisfied.

Let Gratefulness Overflow Into Blessing

The title for this week's column comes from one of the most beautiful videos I have ever seen. The video is a TED talk and the focus of the video is nature, beauty, and gratitude. Watching and reflecting on this video seems like a powerful way to prepare for the celebration of Thanksgiving. In fact, you might even want to share the video when you gather with family and friends next week. The video brings the stunning time-lapse photography of Louie Schwartzberg together with words spoken by a Benedictine monk named Brother David Steindl-Rast. Brother David invites us to pay attention, really pay attention to the simple gifts and blessings of life that can be so easily taken for granted. He points out that paying attention to the wonder of nature and the wonder of the people we encounter in our life is the basis for authentic gratitude. I could not agree more.

You can view the video at https://www.ted.com/talks/louie_schwartzberg_nature_beauty_gratitude?language=en

You will not regret investing the ten minutes it takes to watch this video. Brother David's words begin four and half minutes into the video. If you want to read along as Brother David speaks, the text for his words is printed below.

     We at Living Compass wish you all a Happy Thanksgiving. And in the words of Brother David, "May your gratefulness overflow into blessing all around you". 

     You think that this is just another day in your life... It's not just another day. It's the one day that is given to you - today... It's given to you. It's a gift. It's the only gift that you have right now... ...and the only appropriate response is gratefulness. 

     If you do nothing else but to cultivate that response to the great gift that this unique day is... If you learn to respond as if it were the first day in your life and the very last day then you will have spent this day very well. 

     Begin by opening your eyes, and be surprised that you have eyes you can open. That incredible array of colors that is constantly offered to us for our pure enjoyment. Look at the sky. We so rarely look at the sky. We so rarely note how different it is from moment to moment, with clouds coming and going. We just think of the weather, and even with the weather we don't think of all the many nuances of weather... We just think of "good weather" and "bad weather." 

     This day, right now, with its unique weather, maybe a kind that will never exactly in that form come again.. The formation of clouds in the sky will never be the same as it is right now...       Open your eyes. Look at that. 

     Look at the faces of people whom you meet. Each one has an incredible story behind their face, a story that you could never fully fathom. Not only their own story, but the story of their ancestors. We all go back so far... 

     And in this present moment on this day, all the people you meet, all that life from generations and from so many places all over the world flows together and meets you here like a life giving water if you only open your heart and drink. 

     Open your heart to the incredible gifts that civilization gives to us. You flip a switch and there is electric light. You turn a faucet and there is warm water, and cold water, and drinkable water... a gift that millions and millions in the world will never experience. 

     So these are just a few of an enormous number of gifts to which you can open your heart. 

     And so I am wishing you will open your heart to all these blessings and let them flow through you. That everyone you will meet on this day will be blessed by you, just by your eyes, by your smile, by your touch, just by your presence. 

     Let the gratefulness overflow into blessing all around you. Then it will REALLY be a good day.

Words by Brother David Steindl-Rast

Nature, Love, and Gratitude

I am currently on a week long spiritual retreat in the mountains of western North Carolina.  Rather than take time away from the retreat and write a new column for this week, I am choosing to repeat a column from a few years ago about beauty, love, and gratitude.  The timing is good for the this column as Thanksgiving is less than a week away. The timing is also good, perhaps, given how much pain and darkness we are witnessing in the world right now.  The Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, facing the kind of horrible violence we are seeing today, taught us that, “Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”   May the video referred to in this column be a much needed source of light and love for us all.  

"Let Gratefulness Overflow Into Blessing"

The title for this week's column comes from one of the most beautiful videos I have ever seen. The video is a TED talk and the focus of the video is nature, love, and gratitude. Watching and reflecting on this video seems like a powerful way to prepare for the celebration of Thanksgiving. In fact, you might even want to share the video when you gather with family and friends next week.

The video brings the stunning time-lapse photography of Louie Schwartzberg together with words spoken by a Benedictine monk named Brother David Steindl-Rast. Brother David invites us to pay attention, really pay attention to the simple gifts and blessings of life that can be so easily taken for granted. He points out that paying attention to the wonder of nature and the wonder of the people we encounter in our life is the basis for authentic love and gratitude. I could not agree more.

You can view the video at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2egMSliB8DE

You will not regret investing the five minutes it takes to watch this video. If you want to read along as Brother David speaks, the text for his words is printed below.

     We at Living Compass wish you all a Happy Thanksgiving. And in the words of Brother David, "May your gratefulness overflow into blessing all around you". 

     You think that this is just another day in your life... It's not just another day. It's the one day that is given to you - today... It's given to you. It's a gift. It's the only gift that you have right now... ...and the only appropriate response is gratefulness. 

     If you do nothing else but to cultivate that response to the great gift that this unique day is... If you learn to respond as if it were the first day in your life and the very last day then you will have spent this day very well. 

     Begin by opening your eyes, and be surprised that you have eyes you can open. That incredible array of colors that is constantly offered to us for our pure enjoyment. Look at the sky. We so rarely look at the sky. We so rarely note how different it is from moment to moment, with clouds coming and going. We just think of the weather, and even with the weather we don't think of all the many nuances of weather... We just think of "good weather" and "bad weather." 

     This day, right now, with its unique weather, maybe a kind that will never exactly in that form come again.. The formation of clouds in the sky will never be the same as it is right now... 

     Open your eyes. Look at that. 

     Look at the faces of people whom you meet. Each one has an incredible story behind their face, a story that you could never fully fathom. Not only their own story, but the story of their ancestors. We all go back so far... 

     And in this present moment on this day, all the people you meet, all that life from generations and from so many places all over the world flows together and meets you here like a life giving water if you only open your heart and drink. 

     Open your heart to the incredible gifts that civilization gives to us. You flip a switch and there is electric light. You turn a faucet and there is warm water, and cold water, and drinkable water... a gift that millions and millions in the world will never experience. 

     So these are just a few of an enormous number of gifts to which you can open your heart. 

     And so I am wishing you will open your heart to all these blessings and let them flow through you. That everyone you will meet on this day will be blessed by you, just by your eyes, by your smile, by your touch, just by your presence. 

     Let the gratefulness overflow into blessing all around you. Then it will REALLY be a good day.

Words by Brother David Steindl-Rast

The Way You Look At Things

Earlier this year Chanie Gorkin, an 11th grader from Brooklyn, was asked to write a poem about her worst day ever as part of a school assignment. This creative seventeen-year-old fulfilled the assignment, but did so much more in the process. Her poem, found below, has gone viral and reached millions of people in the last six months. It reminds us that much of what we experience in our life depends on the attitude and perspective we bring to all that we encounter.

     Read this poem from top to bottom to get one perspective. Next, read it from bottom to top and you will get a completely different perspective. Then share it with others to help spread this young woman's positive attitude and gift of writing with others.

Today was the absolute worst day ever

And don't try to convince me that

There's something good in every day

Because, when you take a closer look,

This world is a pretty evil place.

Even if

Some goodness does shine through once in a while

Satisfaction and happiness don't last.

And it's not true that

It's all in the mind and heart

Because

True happiness can be obtained

Only if one's surroundings are good

It's not true that good exists

I'm sure you can agree that

The reality

Creates

My attitude

It's all beyond my control

And you'll never in a million years hear me say that

Today was a good day

Now read from bottom to top.

What is Hallowed For You?

I'm a bit of a nerd when it comes to words. I love to study their origins, their etymology, to more fully understand their meaning. A word that will be on many people's minds this weekend is Halloween and in case you don't know, it has a fascinating origin. All Saints Day, which is celebrated on November 1, was originally known as All Hallows Day and is an annual celebration of the saints who have gone on before us and whose lives are worthy of admiration and emulation. The evening before All Hallows Day became known as All Hallows Eve and over time All Hallows Eve morphed into our modern name for this day, Halloween.

     To continue my nerdish interest in words, I must note that I love the word hallow even though it is not a word that currently gets much use.   Exceptions are when someone talks about the "hallowed halls"of a particular institution, most often a university or school, or when someone talks about sacred ground, such a cemetery or battlefield. Of course, if a person says the Lord's Prayer on a regular basis then he or she is using the word hallowed as they pray the phrase "hallowed be your name." When people pray the words of the Lord's Prayer they are saying that they believe God's name to be holy, sacred, or hallowed.

   The word hallowed, from which our word Halloween is derived, means holy or sacred. When we refer to something as hallowed we are saying that it has special, often spiritual, significance for us. So with all the attention to Halloween this week, perhaps it is a good time to pause and reflect on just what we celebrate as hallowed or holy in our lives.

   In our Living Compass programs we invite people to pause and reflect on what is most important in their lives. We remind them that there are many compasses that are competing to guide our lives, including the compasses of our popular culture, the values of our families of origin, of our friends, our work, and our spirituality. To make our spirituality or our values our primary compass means to identify what we believe to be most holy, most hallowed, and then to align the decisions we make in our lives with those values and beliefs.

   If we say that our faith, other people, or nature are holy to us, then we want to live our lives in a way that is integrated with these beliefs. To do otherwise will, over time, foster a sense of dis-ease and dis-integration. However, when the core decisions in our lives do align with our core beliefs and values, we will experience a greater sense of joy, meaning, and satisfaction. It's as easy as that, and as hard as that.

   So lest this discussion of Halloween and the meaning of hallowed get too serious, just know that I will be happily answering the door and handing out candy to the trick-or-treaters this Saturday. Why? Because while I can't necessarily say I believe candy corn and chocolate bars are holy, I can say without a doubt that having fun with others, especially children, is one of the holiest, most hallowed activities I know.

Happy Halloween!