I want to start by thanking the many readers of this column who, in response to my request over the last two weeks, have sent me their favorite Dadisms. As you will see below, the collective wisdom of these fathers and grandfathers is quite expansive.
As much as I loved receiving the Dadisms, what I enjoyed, even more, was reading the stories that readers shared about their fathers and grandfathers. Sometimes it was a story that provided the context for the Dadism that was shared. Other times, the memory of what their fathers had said to them brought forth a flood of touching and even funny memories they wanted to share. Many thanked me for sparking their memories and the opportunity to share their stories.
Of course, not everyone is fortunate to have had a loving father. Several readers shared that the words they most remembered their fathers sharing with them, were hurtful, and at times, even abusive. It broke my heart to read what was shared, while at the same time, I was inspired by how many wrote that they had or are currently engaging in the real work it takes to heal and transcend deep hurt from one's childhood.
This made me aware again that words have the power to lift less the people in our lives, as well as the power to hurt them. Clearly, the quote, "People won't always remember what you said, but they will always remember how you made them feel," is true both positively and negatively. Our words are that important.
As we pause to remember our fathers, grandfathers, and the other important men in our lives this Father's Day, may we also pause to reflect on the effect that our words have on the people we love, and pledge to use words that lift up, rather than tear down. Our fathers would be proud.
Here are the Dadisms that readers shared. Enjoy.
"And so it goes."
"You can do anything you put your mind to."
"Always treat others the way you would want to be treated, and never ever let me see or hear you treat your mother badly."
"Don't let that cut you" (He was referring to farm implements. But I came to take it as being careful in all walks of life.
"Shut the door... we're not air conditioning the outside." and "Shut the door... we're not heating the outside.”
"Whatever you do, don't ever get old."
"Life is not a spectator sport."
"All parents are amateurs."
"Never spend your money in an establishment that disrespects you."
"Just do it, get done and be through with it."
"What did your mom say?"
"Never mistreat or disrespect a woman."
"When the going gets tough, the tough get going!"
"The only difference between me and him is I shaved today."
"Rub it off."
"I've got five million dollars upstairs" was a line my grandfather always used, whenever we would be talking about wealth. Of course, he meant the five children he had (my dad and his siblings).
"The best way to lose friends is to borrow money from them."
"Honey, this too shall pass."
"Never turn down an interview."
"If you have to look at the prices, you shouldn't be eating there."
"You have no idea how lucky you are."
"Those who speak, don't always do. Those who do, don't always speak."
"I don't understand how people cannot believe in God when they look at a sunset."
"Yesterday is a canceled check. Tomorrow a promissory note. Today is cash."
"A short pencil is better than a long memory."
"You can always find something good to say about every person. And if you can't, you shouldn't say anything at all!"
"Use your better judgment next time."
"I'm not sleeping, I'm just resting my eyes."
"I'm very proud of all you've done but take time to have fun in life too!"
"You don't need to tell anyone how good you are. If it's true, others will know."
"Everything in moderation, including moderation!"
"A little dirt never hurt anyone."
"I think about what I have, not what I don't have."
"Attitude is everything".
"Always, remember how much I love you."
And Happy Father's Day to all the Dads who are reading this!
P.S. It's not too late to share your own Dadisms and to discuss this column. We post the Weekly Words of Wellness column on our Living Compass Facebook page each Friday morning and readers are encouraged to share their thoughts there. You can visit our Facebook page by clicking HERE. Scroll down to find today's column and share your Dadisms and other thoughts in the comments section.
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